


so much (that it's overflowing)

by vaguethursdays



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Established Relationship, Idol AU, M/M, Mentioned Iwaizumi Hajime, Mentioned Kiryuu Wakatsu, Mentioned Oikawa Tooru, kuroo tetsurou is loved
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-17
Updated: 2020-08-17
Packaged: 2021-03-05 23:00:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,348
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25953328
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vaguethursdays/pseuds/vaguethursdays
Summary: “I hope you guys are ready for this! I’m counting on you to at least try to look like you’re having as much fun as I am,” Oikawa winks at Akaashi, “even you Keiji-kun!”“Please don’t forget the lyrics this time, Oikawa-san.” Akaashi strikes back. Tetsurou and the others snicker when Oikawa stumbles over his words, trying to form a proper comeback.Tetsurou already feels his mood lifting; while he might feel lonely from time to time with the distance between him and Koutarou, it’s these moments with his friends and bandmates that help make that absence bearable.
Relationships: Bokuto Koutarou/Kuroo Tetsurou
Comments: 8
Kudos: 52
Collections: Kuroo Week 2020





	so much (that it's overflowing)

**Author's Note:**

> me, plotting my ideas for kuroo week: haha i'll keep these nice and short like 500 words, i just wanna flex my brain a little bit  
> me, fleshing out this entire au: haha bitch u thought

Nerves vibrating in his bones before a concert isn’t anything new for Tetsurou. Having a mountain of what-ifs comes with the job; never knowing how a crowd is going to react to new twists on their favorite songs or the possibilities of stage equipment malfunctioning mid-song despite working perfectly during rehearsals, anything could happen. Logically he knows they have measures in place just in case something happens, but it doesn’t completely erase the worries he carries.

But that’s why they all have their pre-show rituals. 

Akaashi prefers to keep to himself, curled up in a chair with a book, sometimes pulling out his pocket notebook to jot down any thoughts or potential lyrics. Kiryuu is much the same with regards to keeping to himself, but he prefers to mentally prepare with headphones playing their own music, moving his hands along, almost methodically, as if he’ll forget how to play if he doesn’t.

Oikawa and Iwaizumi’s routine is rather interesting. They make their vocal warm-ups a competition; can Oikawa hit his highest highs with ease first, or will Iwaizumi be able to hit his lowest lows first? Tetsurou sometimes joins in when he’s feeling a bit more antagonistic than usual, but even after being in a band together for 4 years, he still doesn’t quite understand the rules to this competition. Honestly, he’s not even sure they understand the rules themselves. 

Tetsurou prefers to run through his vocal warm-ups first, followed by a good full-body stretch. Oikawa says it’s because Tetsurou thinks his muscles look better after, which okay, might be a little true, but he also likes to move around a lot more on stage than his bandmates, and the last time he didn’t stretch, Tetsurou wound up pulling a muscle in his shoulder when he was trying to look cool by jumping and spinning in a circle at the same time with his bass. 

Before he does any of that, Tetsurou pulls his phone out to check it one last time before curtain.

No new messages, he hasn’t gotten any in about an hour, but he skims through them anyway.

**KOU 🦉💕**

**[5:45]** have fun tonight!! 

**[5:45]** i still wish i could make it :( i miss u

**[5:45]** but i know ur going to kill it!!!

i know, i wish you could be here too **[5:46]**

and i miss you too **[5:46]**

just wait though, time will pass by in a flash and we’ll have more time together after season’s over and tour’s finished **[5:47]**

i love you **[5:48]**

**[5:49]** soon!!! 

**[5:49]** :D

**[5:49]** i love you too!!!!

Their schedules overlapping isn’t anything new. Like sure, it’s always a bit disappointing, but between Tetsurou preparing for CCC’s tour and Koutarou traveling for V. League games, their time together in the last few months has drastically decreased. It isn’t anyone’s fault though that their first performance is in Osaka tonight, while the Jackals’ game last night was in Tokyo, and that’s what makes it so hard.

Tetsurou can feel something heavy starting to form in the pit of his stomach alongside his nerves. Now isn’t the time to brood over this, he thinks, shoving his phone in his backpack.

Gotta warm up, gotta stretch, gotta change mindsets before walking on stage.

His warm-ups do an okay job at distracting him, the feeling of his muscles stretching allow him to focus on something other than the small pangs of loneliness in his chest. After all, they knew that there would be periods of time like this; the compromise of not wanting to give up their career and lifestyles, but also not wanting to let go of each other. 

“15 minutes until showtime!” 

Tetsurou feels himself coming back to the present. Deep breath. One, two, three.

As Oikawa and Iwaizumi are just about done with their competition, everyone huddles into a circle, staff not too far behind them. 

“I hope you guys are ready for this! I’m counting on you to at least try to look like you’re having as much fun as I am,” Oikawa winks at Akaashi, “even you Keiji-kun!”

“Please don’t forget the lyrics this time, Oikawa-san.” Akaashi strikes back. Tetsurou and the others snicker when Oikawa stumbles over his words, trying to form a proper comeback.

Tetsurou already feels his mood lifting; while he might feel lonely from time to time with the distance between him and Koutarou, it’s these moments with his friends and bandmates that help make that absence bearable. 

He makes it a point to look at every single one of them before putting his hand out toward the middle of the huddle, and in turn they put their hands out as well. “We all worked our asses off for this, so let’s get out there and give our fans their money’s worth!” 

Tetsurou counts down from three, everyone shouts at the same time, “CCC FIGHT!”

xxxxx

Tetsurou’s standing stage right with Akaashi, waiting for their VCR to finish before they make their grand entrance. He’s flexing his fingers, antsy to get on stage already; his nervousness rattling his bones at full force.

“Kuroo-san,” Akaashi leans in close so he can be heard over the speakers, “I hope you can give it your 120% tonight.” 

He knows there’s a deeper meaning to that, something Akaashi purposely left unsaid, there always is, but Tetsurou doesn’t have time to dig into it. 

The lights above the audience dim and the stage lights shower the crowd in blues and pinks; smoke billows out from the fog machines, and the walk out music grows louder by the second. 

It’s time. 

Staff members start signalling for each member to make their entrance starting with Kiryuu. He takes a second to bow to the crowd before taking his place behind the drums; he told Tetsurou once that the first time he did that on stage was a complete accident, his nervousness had gotten the better of him, but their fans loved it so much that he just kept doing it. Tetsurou gets it, wanting to make sure the fans enjoy every single aspect of their performance. It’s natural to feel like you want to give back to the people who support you in some way.

Iwaizumi takes his position next more towards the center of the stage, making a show of flexing his arms while lifting the guitar. Everyone knows he does it on purpose, but they also know Iwaizumi will never admit to it. “Why do I need to purposely show off? We all know Oikawa shows off enough for at least 3 people’s worth,” he’d probably say if he’s ever asked.

Tetsurou’s next to walk out. His bones finally settle. 

The walk out ranks top 3 in his ‘favorite moments’ list. He might share the stage with his bandmates, but those few moments where everyone is cheering for him and him alone? Pure ecstasy.

As soon as Tetsurou starts plucking the strings on his bass, Akaashi walks out next, taking his place to the right of Tetsurou. Everything about him radiates ‘gracefulness,’ from his walk out to the way he straps his guitar on, like there’s never a wasted movement. With the way the fans eat it up, Tetsurou might think Akaashi was the most popular member…

But when Oikawa comes out, it almost feels as if there’s an earthquake; the sheer volume of the fans cheering shakes the ground beneath them. He overemphasizes his gestures as he blows a kiss to the crowd, and the screams are so, so clear in their earpieces. When he’s done situating himself behind his keyboard, he pulls his mic closer to him and screams, “OSAKAAAAA, ARE YOU REAAAADY?!” 

Tetsurou usually allows himself to get lost in their first song when they play concerts, eyes closed to allow himself to focus on the energy while he works the bass strings like it’s second nature; they like to start out strong, heavy on the happy and upbeat vibes, hoping everyone is prepared to get on their feet and dance.

But tonight felt a little different, like something was commanding him to give his immediate attention.

He looks over at Akaashi, as if the guitarist will have an answer for his unspoken question, and if Tetsurou didn’t know any better, he would’ve missed the small head tilt towards the audience.

And god, he’s so glad he didn’t miss it because when he looks over at the crowd for the first time, Koutarou’s standing right at the barricade, perfectly in front of where Tetsurou’s position on stage is, equipped with their band’s lightstick. When Koutarou knows he’s looking at him, he pulls down his face mask and mouths “I love you” at Tetsurou, and through sheer willpower, Tetsurou holds back his tears and urges to kiss his boyfriend stupid. 

It’s amazing that he even remembers to sing his own lines at this point, he thinks. 

xxxxx 

Throughout the night, Tetsurou has to mentally remind himself to move about the stage as he normally would; he would love to just stand there and serenade Koutarou, but he knows he still has a much larger crowd to please tonight. 

He makes it a point to play around behind Oikawa and his keyboard, shares a mic with Iwaizumi, dances around Kiryuu, and even gets Akaashi to do a little back and forth with him.

Tetsurou thinks this might be the happiest he’s ever been, so when it comes time for their ending speeches, he completely pushes the one he rehearsed over and over out of his head and instead, he wants to try and properly express all of these feelings before they overflow.

After he sets his bass down in it’s stand, Tetsurou sits on the ground. It doesn’t allow him to be quite eye-level with Koutarou, but it’ll have to do. 

“I’d like to get real with you guys for a minute, if that’s alright.” He’s sure the guys are exchanging looks behind him since this wasn’t in the plan, but fuck it, he can’t stop grinning. 

“I am… so incredibly happy and thankful for everything that you do for me, for coming out despite the busy schedule I know you have. It must’ve been tiring, and I love you so much.”

There’s echoes of ‘no’s and ‘it’s not tiring’ coming from their fans, and that’s fine with him. He knows that Koutarou knows this speech is for him, his mouth in a firm line and hands gripping the barricade so tight that his knuckles are going white. Tetsurou can see that he’s not the only one holding themself back right now.

“You’re the first thing I think of when I wake up and the last thing before I fall asleep.” Tetsurou can feel his throat tightening up, tears threatening to fall from his eyes. “Not being able to see you every day is hard, but pushing through those moments for the ones that we get to spend together? It’s worth it every single time.” 

Deep breath. One, two three.

“I hope we can continue to choose to walk through life with each other for a long time. Thank you for loving me as much as you do.”

Tetsurou gives Koutarou the biggest smile he can muster, before getting up and brushing off the nonexistent dust off his jeans, giving his best shot at keeping his shit together while the rest of his bandmates give their ending speeches. 

When they walk off stage for a moment to change their shirts to prepare for their encore, Tetsurou corners Akaashi, “did you know?” 

Akaashi gives him one of those knowing smiles, “I don’t know what you mean, Kuroo-san, but if you’d like to go leave after we greet our guests, please feel free. I’ll handle everything.”

Tetsurou laughs, “This is why you’re my favorite. I owe you big time.”

“I’ll hold you to that.”

xxxxx 

They’re given a few minutes backstage to clean up before their guests come in to meet them and it feels like an eternity to Tetsurou. He feels a bit guilty for not giving his entire attention to the artists and various other important people in the industry, but all he can think about right now is kissing his boyfriend.

By the time Koutarou comes back, the only people that are left are Tetsurou’s bandmates and a few remaining members of their own staff.

Once Tetsurou sees him, they meet each other halfway, nearly crashing into each other, and Koutarou kisses him like it’s the last thing he’ll ever do in his life. 

“Tetsu, you gotta give me some warning the next time you wanna say all of that.” Koutarou kisses him again, “Do you know how hard it was for me not to jump over that barricade to kiss you?”

“I think I have a pretty good idea about it.” Tetsurou’s laugh is muffled by another kiss, “How are you even here, aren’t you supposed to be in Tokyo? You didn’t push those teenage girls out of the way to get to the front did you?”

“I WOULD NEVER! Kenma did me a solid and stood in line for me until the doors opened. Also I took the last flight out right after our game. I missed you too much and wanted to see you again before you went on tour.”

“Kenma willingly stood outside in line?”

“Okay… I might’ve bribed him a little bit…”

Tetsurou laughs again and rests his forehead on Koutarou’s shoulder. It’s unbelievable, he thinks, he must’ve used up a lifetime’s worth of luck to be able to love and be loved by someone this much.

He turns his head to look at Akaashi, only getting as far as opening his mouth before Akaashi says something first. “Go already, we don’t leave until the day after tomorrow.”

Koutarou doesn’t waste a second before he’s tugging on his hand to leave, yelling thanks, and Tetsurou waves goodbye to the rest of the band with the promise of treating them later. 

He swears he’s the happiest person in the world right now. 

**Author's Note:**

> hi please come cry about bokuroo with me on [ twitter ](https://twitter.com/vaguethursdays_) :)


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